Bucktown State of Mind

21 Days Clean… of Nicotene

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21 days clean of nicotine. So here’s the truth and nothing but the truth.  I’m not as cranky as I was at eight days, but I still want a Newport when I wake up with my coffee. I still want a cigarette when I’m trying to figure some technical shit out. And to be a 100% honest, if I didn’t out myself publicly via my blog, Facebook, Beatminerz Radio and Twitter I probably would have bummed or bought a loosey a few days ago, but I stay STRONG! (STRONG I  SAY!)

Although this is my third attempt to quit, I can’t remember how long it takes before the cravings officially go away. It seems that this go round is harder chemically but easier mentally. I say that because I draw my strength and inspiration from my 14 year old baby cousin Andre in Texas, who was diagnosed with brain cancer this summer.  After six weeks of intense chemotherapy he is cancer free, and his doctor said it is as if the tumor never existed.  Andre has handled his entire experience like a natural warrior… fearlessly. One, he never questioned why this was happening to him and two he never doubted that he would conquer the cancer.

Damn… would I be that fearless if faced with cancer? A cancer that I could have been responsible for? NO! So I say to myself…  bi$#% just stop smoking cause you’re killing yourself!  Yeah that works, as the aroma of nicotine seeps under my door from my next door neighbor smoking in the hallway. The saga continues.

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2 Comments, Comment or Ping

  1. rzanumba1

    nice job. keep it up…you know the whole beatminerz chat supports you.

  2. Sallome

    Sistah! I am sooooo proud of you. I had no idea that you had taken on living a longer life. :-) You are such an inspiration. And in solidarity I will stay away from the white stuff (bread, white rice, and granulated sugar) – my drug.

    I’ll keep you posted.

    Love and solidarity.

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